brain dump - day 57.

My list of stuff rolling in my head today. Probably not interesting, but I am posting mainly for my own record.

So, yesterday we hit the $10,000 mark in fund raising.... PRAISE GOD!!!

Today, I started reading some people's current stories of time/money spent in Ukraine and I am scared, nervous, all out panicking! I know God will provide exactly what we need... I mean look at what he has done so far - and tomorrow is the 8 week mark from when we started.

It is looking like our dossier submission will be mid-late September if nothing changes between now and then.... meaning a strong likelihood of January travel time. Ukraine in January.... not sure if I still have a coat built for that.

We are waiting on our biometrics appointments to be set. I have no clue what that is.

Every conversation I have with someone about this process I learn something new that I think I should have already known.... I often feel like I am trying to find my child in a dark room filled with an unknown number of obstacles that keep moving. I wonder if I am alone in that... or if there are other blind parents looking for kids in the dark as well.

I never knew I could miss someone like I miss Lena. I go through my days thinking. This time next year (it should be sooner than that, but my head works this way) she will be here. Will she like this lunch? I can't wait to have family photos done with 5 of us!

We have three big fundraisers coming up. Burpee-a-thon this weekend, Grace Klein family night on Sept 7, and the 5k on Sept 14.

I am a perfectionist.... I typically like to either do something perfectly, or not try at all. This process is really pushing me on that. Some things (paperwork) have to be done perfectly every.single.time. Other things, (fundraisers) I want to be perfect, but it is tough to make that happen!

If there is one thing I have learned so far - it is that there is absolutely NOTHING in my control.... and NOTHING out of God's control. and for that, I am thankful.